Canadian Facebook users will no doubt be aware that news reports from Canadian sources are not welcome on the Facebook platform (also known as Meta). In an effort to accommodate Canadian users and potential users, Sterling Enterprises[i] is developing an alternative social medium – a plan B, if you will.
Not one to take a back seat to anyone, Sterling Macaulay initially registered the new platform’s internet domain name as “Facebook Plan B.” Almost immediately, he thought better of that and changed it to “Plan A.” It’s now known as “Facebook-eh.”
While a full slate of user rules is still under consideration, Macaulay is adamant that a more Canadian communication environment will prevail.
“There’s so much crap on the Facebook, it should be called Fecesbook,” Macaulay said.
“It’s our desire to have a basic set of principles by which users will abide, no lies, no threats, no abuse, eh?”
“We’re the ‘eh team,” he said. “It’s our desire to create an honest-to-goodness medium that is, well, honest. To steal a line from the late Jack Layton (former NDP leader now deceased, ed.), I believe better is possible. Instead of ‘no holds barred,’ Facebook-eh will have a policy of ‘no holes bared.’ Strictly family appropriate language and images.”
Macaulay does admit that most of the people he’s communicated with aren’t overly optimistic that Facebook-eh will work, but all have encouraged him to go to trial anyway.
“Somebody has to take the stand,” Macaulay said, “and we hope the new platform will stand the test of time. It’s the Canadian way, eh?”
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[i] Sterling Macaulay, of Sterling Enterprises, is a fictional character first introduced in the short story collection, No Place Like Home by Mike R Hunter. The mind of Sterling Macaulay is also the subject of a couple of blog posts available with these links: https://mike-r-hunter.blogspot.com/2023/04/satire-codcast-roborepo.html and https://mike-r-hunter.blogspot.com/2023/03/satire-codcast.html. Watch for more of Sterling Enterprises forthcoming in Ideas for Sale: The Life and Times of an Entrepreneur.
